The reference therein is to this debunked rumor, complete with a false police report, suggesting Beck committed a rape in 1990.  The linked website refutes the rumor, as does the site set up to promote it, aptly called DidGlennBeckRapeandMurderaYoungGirlin1990.com, which says that what they’re doing is an attempt to satirize tactics used by Beck himself.  Clearly, some people didn’t get it.  (Equally clearly, some people of my own ideological persuasion are just as stupid as those attracted to Glenn Beck.  Of course they’re in Adams Morgan.)

I suppose I compromise my own morals by promoting such a canard, but it is supposed to be satire and I really don’t like Glenn Beck and I really am desperate for visitors.  I think it’s about time I start believing in a moral system which simply takes the aggregate of lots of different motivations and adds the value together in a fairly random spastic way which reconfirms what I wanted to do in the first place.  Does such a thing exist?

Ethics is fun.

Props by the way to Andrew Fogle.  (Who of course was in Adams Morgan.)  Ironically this is at once the most comprehensible and most false communication I’ve ever had with you.

Never say duh

7 September 2009

I discovered this gem bumbling around YouTube today.  You have to give Richard Dawson credit, he refuses to be stymied by the absolute blinding incomprehension he’s facing.


Trying on Levi

12 August 2009

The latest phase of the Levi Johnston charm offensive – dating Kathy Griffin.  Somehow I’m not sure his people fully vetted this whole thing, but she’s smart enough to milk that shit for all it’s worth.

Followed up by this hysterical interview when she guest-hosted Larry King Live:

Killer ratings

12 August 2009

This is a pretty remarkable story out of Brazil.  It’s not a place not famed for rigorous law enforcement, true, but a television presenter by day and drug kingpin by night who takes out hits on rivals and then scoops his own news team is an innovation in production that I last saw in the movie Running Man. (And hoped for more than a few reasons I wouldn’t see again.)

Money quote:

The authorities believe that Mr Souza commissioned at least five murders in order to get rid of drug trafficking rivals and to boost his programme ratings.

They say he wanted to prove his claims that the region he represented in the state of Amazonas was plagued with crime.

What’s that?  You heard right, he was also a state legislator!  (Amazonas seems from a cursory glance to be a little bit like Mississippi.  A really fucked up Mississippi.)  Whenever somebody in Tallahassee gets me down, I’ll think of this charming face and feel better.  Especially when I think of the fact that Souza

remains free because for the moment his political role gives him immunity.

I was going to say “Mark Burnett, eat your heart out,” but I fear Mr. Souza might take it literally.  And not even Survivor is that bad.

My first fail

4 August 2009

Thank me later.

Life pwned

Life pwned

I’m not even going to lie, I saw this first on Auto-Tune the News.  I had to look it up to see if it was real.  Tragically.

Let there be no mistake that she’s right, driving while texting (while intexticated?) is a bad idea.  And yet somehow I doubt that many of the people who do it will be swayed by Katie Couric’s opinion.  Or will even hear of it.  Though it is somehow more relevant than her message on crocs.

I’d be interested to know if these were ever aired.  Here’s hoping not.

A Stormy temper

3 August 2009

Sadly I place this without an attendant picture… though perhaps that’s a mistake.  So:

My favorite Senate candidate... ever.

My favorite Senate candidate... ever.

Stormy Daniels, my queen over the water and potential candidate for the Senate seat held by David Vitter of her home state, Louisiana, ran into a little bit of trouble a short time ago.  In addition to being surprised that she lives so close to my hometown – she and the late Billy Mays are high on our list of famous residents – I cannot help wondering if it’s possible to have a feminist domestic abuse call.  If so, this is definitely it.

[P]orn star Stormy Daniels (real name: Stephanie Clifford) was arrested Saturday afternoon for domestic violence after she allegedly battered her husband because she was “upset because the way the laundry had been done.”

You go, girl.

[UPDATE: I don’t know what it is with Tampa Bay and having issues with porn stars.  But lest I forget to remind you.

Story courtesy of Rich.  Always looking out for me.

Birther control

27 July 2009

Buried within the Politico story on the birther movement today was this quote from Collin Peterson (D – Minnesota-West), reacting to the Mike Castle incident from last week:

“Twenty-five percent of my people believe the Pentagon and Rumsfeld were responsible for taking the twin towers down,” [he said]. “That’s why I don’t do town meetings.”

I offer first my usual respect to a politician who says something they think to be the case.  Right or wrong, truth ought to be incentivized.

He is correct that a town meeting can attract a healthy amount of the crazy.  But there’s a babies-and-bathwater problem here, isn’t there?  You risk excluding people with legitimate concerns by summarily rejecting this kind of forum.  You can’t talk to everybody individually, after all, and this is a real moment when people come face to face with their representatives.  Is a town meeting so different from putting together a focus group?  I know of few major politicians who reject that at the risk of stirring up the nutters.

Crazy people are a major risk we take with democracy.  We’ve decided that’s worth it.  The logic in favor of public meetings, whether or not Mr. Peterson agrees, is the same.  Perhaps there wouldn’t be so many if public figures were willing to go to such a meeting and invest the time necessary to talk people down from conspiracy theories like this.  Truth is the best defense against unreality.  Maybe you’ll never convince everybody, but I firmly believe that given the time and effort of an honest ear most people will come around.  Ignoring them makes it worse – and only adds more fuel to the belief that government is distant, unresponsive, and run by sinister Kenyan Manchurian candidates.


23 July 2009


Thanks to Krista, Cassie, Shea and others who have all unsuccessfully helped me find it at one time or another.  Thanks to the creators of Daria who used it in the first season.  Thanks to the guy who uploaded French bootlegs of it onto Youtube.

Wrongful termination, anyone?

Also, to be perfectly fair, I don’t know why participation in an industry whose members can run for the United States Senate should disqualify someone from a job through marriage.